Boob vs. the Volcano

A little less than a year ago, when I began this project, I lovingly and laughingly referred to it as my Boob Enterprise. I tried to come up with a creative title and had a web-work of scrawls filling a page with "breast" lingo. What do you call them - after all, they're used for various purposes with designated labels that depend on the person doing the labeling. For example, when referring to someone's classy tits it's slightly more refined to speak of her bust. It's also a fact that one in eight women does not get "boob" cancer, rather she will deal with "breast" cancer. However, four in ten men don't ogle at mammaries - but hooters, jugs, or bazooms they'll stare at for hours. Sometimes they're knockers, other times a rack. What about jugs, tits, mere cleavage, ta-tas, bosom, udders, perhaps globes, honkers, or simply put, body parts. So many names and it all depends on how you say it and how you've heard it said before.

As testified by dictionary.com, the word "boob" is actually vulgar slang for the female breast. But which of the seven non-obsolete definitions for vulgar applies in this scenario? It would seem I've gone the wrong route in selling "boob" molds rather than "breast" molds as it implies a lack of taste, can be thought of as obscene, or heaven forbid – common, as well as lacking in charm and aesthetic value.

Consider instead the word "breast". Yeah, check out the definition on that one. So formal, so dry, so anatomic, so… politically correct. While I have nothing against the word breast I think there may be too many people with a grudge against "boob." From my first brainstorming session I came to the conclusion that "boobs" are more personal, simple, and comedic with a hint of blunt. They harbor no ill feelings of superiority over their fellow breasts or ta-tas but underwire them all. Don't get me wrong - this is a serious matter, my words are heavy words and cancer is no joke… But I ask you, who could survive without laughter?

When it comes to my mind, and molds, boob and breast are interchangeable, as I like a little laughter with my love. Though I'm not throwing out the word as trash, I think I will revise my eBay titles as I have hope that the word "breast" gets more hits than "boob" and perhaps the serious needs to be read before the humor.

But again, I ask you to add some absurdity to your lives and keep a pair of boobs on the coffee table and hopefully work to save the lives of those suffering from cancer, whether in breast or otherwise. More tit for your tat so to speak.

And as for the title of this piece, it just flowed for some reason.